Welcome to my Evil World

I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
And as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love it's suicide

You say you've cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore

Now I'm praying to God you'll give me one more chance, girl

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you

I know you know we've had some good times
Now they have their own hiding place
I can promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday

And Baby you know my hands are dirty
But I wanted to be your valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty, baby
When you get drunk, I'll be the wine

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

And I wasn't there when you were happy
I wasn't there when you were down
I didn't mean to miss your birthday, baby
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

 

My inspiration for the day, ponder on this...

 

Love is like sleep, the more u try to sleep, the more u get insomnia, the more u try to keep awake, the more u nod off.

Similarly, in love, the more u try to forget someone,the more u are in love with her.....

 

Beautiful....

 

Deep down I'm hiding years of longing,
Years of wanting to be free,
Although outside I look quite normal,
The perfect life most will see,

But inside I feel like screaming out,
But will I for this cost?
To gain what I never had before,
But then this good will be lost,

Oh Honey, where for art thou?
I am helpless without you,
I've lost my years, And cried my tears,
Now what am I to do

My world is falling into place,
I feel more alive,
And yet this cannot complete me,
I am still to fulfil this life,

I do not understand these questions,
And the answers I often fear,
I'm walking the road to eternal bliss,
But the pathway is just not clear,

Oh Honey, where for art thou?
You've seen your own years through,
But I, I still am searching,
Now what am I to do

In one month to this very day,
I'll age another year more,
I'll see another perfect birthday through,
They'll make me smile for sure,

But parts of me are empty,
I stand lonely on this perch,
I can't complete this perfect life,
Without this solemn search.

Been receiving some notes from friends recently... the gist of it is that i have never written anything at all since October last year. Well, truth be told, i've been very busy with work, work and more work... and some other personal issues to attend to.

 

Well, I'm back, and intermittently, i will try to add in some thoughts or comments now and again......

 

Just some thoughts since the last posting.... J'ai perdu mon inspiration... apart from that, i am still me...

This question have been replayed in my head over and over again: "What's worse than the agony of being in Love?"

 

Why would i ask that? Isn't Love a wonderful thing? Well, it is only wonderful if the Love is shared by all, and the Love is pure and unconditional. But hang on, is there such a thing as a pure and unconditional Love? Could i honestly say that i Love this person so much, that I would do anything for her, without any questions asked, knowing that the outcome would not be the one that i desire?

 

What about being on the other side of the coin, where I Love this person so much, that I do not dare to tell her that, for fear it would ruin the great times I have with her right now. For, if I tell her that i am in Love with her, i fear everything will change. The relationship i have built with her will change, no longer will i be the person she could talk to if she wants a comforting ear or shoulder to cry on, for then, i would be another of those guys who are blindly in Love with her. Am i being selfish for doing that?

 

Well, one thing's certain though, by not telling her that I Love her, i have to endure watching from afar as others try to win her heart, knowing that there is nothing i could do to stop them. The agony of it is so excruciating. Tell her i Love her, I'll probably lose her forever, by not telling her i do, well, i've got to be happy for her seeing all the attention she's attracting form others.

 

So, what could be worse than the agony of being in Love?

Was in KL over the weekend, and i woke up on Sunday to news that Bali had its second bomb attack in just under three years. That got me wide awake, as a friend was in Bali. After many frantic calls, i managed to finally reach her, and just to hear her voice loud and clear from my hotel room in KL brought huge sighs of relieve to me.

 

Just to think about it, I was supposed to be in Bali that weekend, but a strange quirk of fate intervened, and i ended up in KL to watch a play instead. And i was off partying my saturday night away after catching the show. Now, if i was in Bali, only God knows I might have been right at the scene of mayhem, the thought of being in some world news never crossing my mind.....

 

I'm just glad my friend had arrived back home safe and sound, and I'm thankful for being able to look forward to many other trips to KL, Bali, or anywhere else. If not for that strange twist of fate that i landed up in KL instead of Bali, I might not be here writing this right now.